My biggest regret:
This post is to inspire other men and woman to support those men and woman to deny the decision of ANY FORM of contraception…
8 years ago I got a vasectomy due to some peer pressure from close friends and you can say it is what society teaches if you hang out with folks that don’t move you where truth lives.
I knew in my heart at the time that it wasn’t right but for secular reasons I proceeded with the procedure. I made up things in my mind about I only have 3 seats in the back of my car so I couldn’t possibly have a family of 6+… And I was too cool for a van…etc. Especially in California, where the focus is on the wrong things like money, titles, success, etc. You really want to know what truly makes your soul happy? Read on…
I grew up with 10 aunts and uncles from my dad’s side and I truly remember the happy Sunday gatherings at Grandma and Grandpa’s Ranch house. So being around big families was a beautiful thing for me.
4 years ago I was challenged by a Non-Denominational Christian of why I’m a Catholic. He attacked me hard and I didn’t know how to defend myself. Honestly, I didn’t know the fullness of my faith. I was on a hunt for seeking truth and not just checking off a box on Sundays. I joined RCIA, listened to Immaculate Heart Radio, Lived my Cursillo (De Colores!), became a Knight of Columbus and my heart was hungry for more. I learned that missing Mass on Sundays is a ‘Mortal Sin’… Additionally, practicing ANY FORM of contraception is a ‘Mortal Sin’.
For those that don’t know what a Mortal Sin is: “A mortal sin, in Catholic theology, is a gravely sinful act, which leads to damnation if a person does not repent of the sin before death. A sin is considered to be “mortal” when its quality is such that it leads to a separation of that person from God’s saving grace.” Even though I confessed this deepest regret, I made a promise to God that I will reverse it since I made that decision when I thought I was in control and playing Him – God..
About a year and a half ago, a new Parish opened up in town that practices “The Traditional Mass.” Which means that anything after the 1960s (Vatican 2) isn’t practice. The music, the people, the Eucharist is all practiced as it should, in reverence. Therefore, about 5 months ago we transferred completely to Holy Martyrs Catholic Church after making a decision as a Father that this will be the Parish that my boys get a solid foundation of their Catholic Faith from. As a former expert lukewarm Catholic – There’s a major difference. For those parents that “let their children choose their faith life” I’m praying for you. Your children are a gift from God and not raising them under the best foundation is just wrong.
As I sat in The Holy Mass one day at Holy Martyrs, I saw several large families. The Holy Spirit literally tugged at my heart and said to me, “it is time”. Imagine an emotional feeling of love and compassion smack you upside the head. Tears of love came soon after…
I reached out to several Catholic brothers about reversing my vasectomy but very few knew anyone that’s gone through it..
Until I spoke to my friend Wes, who led me to a doctor in California who is Catholic. The doctor stated that even if he wanted to charge me $500, the clinic fees alone are $5000. Therefore, I reached out to Wes again asking if he knew someone else a bit more affordable, and he said yes. There is a gentleman by the name of Greg Alexander who actually went through the same situation. He lives in Texas and he will be able to help. So Greg listened to my story and we spoke for about an hour. He pointed me to the Catholic Doctor that did the reversal for him. Greg has a ministry with his wife called The Alexander House that covers this topic and more about marriage life. Greg, my brother – I love you sir, keep fighting the good fight.
I booked the appointment on July 1st, 2019 in Texas and just had my surgery 19 days ago from writing this post. What helped me through the procedure was doing a Rosary and I was completely relaxed. I would like to give a big shoutout to Dr. Roeder Loddie F Jr MD from Microsurgical Vasectomy Reversal, 189 E. Austin Street, Ste. 101, New Braunfels, Tx 78130 – 830-629-0180 – His heart is in the right place. They prayed with me before the surgery and I knew I was in the right place.
I am very open about this private topic because I believe that more men and woman have to hear it from someone who was chasing the wrong “things” in life. I see big families as a completeness of God’s divine LOVE if he wills it. I’m not sure where we got off on hating big families but my only guess can be the attack on the woman’s body in the 1960s (Margret Sanger, Planned Parent Hood, The rise of Liberal Feminism, etc.) and the idea to destroy Masculinity in Men. We can never be equal when it comes to God’s divine creation because each woman and man has a special trait that cannot be duplicated. I know for a fact my wife has more patience than I do when it comes to being the nurturer of the family. I cannot be that person but I am definitely the Man of the family and put my foot down to lift my boys up (and hopefully future children) to become the best they can be under God.
Through this journey, I have been called to be Pro-Life. It’s difficult to be Pro-Life if you’re not open to life… Make sense?
Even if God doesn’t will us new life, I have committed myself to him to be put back together the way he created me. Bucketlist checked Lord.
Since the procedure, my relationship with my wife has become much stronger and loving. I’ve been less “Pissed Off.” Working together in peace. Financially, God has opened up new doors for us. As it turns out, doing the right thing does work out. We encourage all of you to follow the path that is right under God and not follow society’s pressure.
May this story inspire you and change your heart as it did mine. God Love You. In the name of the Father, The Son, and The Holy Spirit… Amen.
Feel free to reach out to me in private. I’m open ears.
Share this Post if You Know Anyone that has struggled through the same emotions.
My Heart is Complete.
Update 1.11.2022 – My wife Xochitl became pregnant 3.15.2021. Our son Emilio Joseph was born on 1.5.2022. A miracle child indeed and a gift from God. We are giddy in the Ramirez household…